Hello again, old friend.

Okay, so I sort of neglected my blog during NaNoWriMo and the following month of Holiday Hell. It wasn't intentional.

I'll catch everyone up to speed on November-December.

November- I started working for Estee Lauder. Only slightly different from working Philosophy and I am now responsible for meeting sales goals. I can't say that I'm too excited about that, but what can you do, right? It's my firm belief that no sales-based job should have quotas in a struggling economy. That will never happen in a capitalist society. I digress.

A friend of mine moved to Ohio and work became a little more dull without her around. I love the other gals there, but you can tell we all miss Alicia.

We had our first co-op Thanksgiving as a married couple. My friend Mary brought us together with her family to celebrate the holiday properly. It was a pretty decent spread for our first attempt and everyone had a good time.

December- Most of the month was shopping and working. Until Christmas night. We had just picked up the girls from their Mom's house and were one whole exit on our way home from Lebanon when the Corolla died. Luckily, we were able to exit and stay out of traffic, but it was quite the experience nonetheless. I'm glad I kept a cool head with two girls in the backseat.

'92 Corolla = Dead engine. The mechanic is currently trying to find a replacement... but that would be more money than that little shitheap is worth. We'll see.

That pretty much brings everyone up to speed. I hope the holidays were awesome.

Fictional lives seem much more interesting.

I just finished reading Good Grief by Lolly Winston and I find myself simultaneously lusting after the main character's life while noticing the similarities with my own.

I love the idea of her starting life over (after the death of her husband) in Ashland, Oregon... in ways she never imagined her life would be. It's a fantastically written novel of re-discovering life. I seem to have an odd fondness for books with that sort of storyline. One of my absolute favorites is How To Talk To A Widower by Jonathan Tropper. EXCELLENT book. I cannot stress that enough. Fabulous writing that sucks you in to be sympathetic with the main character's struggle.

And now, with a similar book, Lolly Winston has forever won her way into my heart. Her other book that I've read is Happiness Sold Separately... which is about a woman dealing with the troubles of divorce. I enjoyed it, but not nearly as much as this one.

God, I love good books.

I always wonder if Josh and I will end up with some sort of patched-together life like the characters I come to love. Will we pseudo-adpot a random teenager who can use the support? Are we going to end up somewhere new, exciting and maybe a bit odd?

Funny thing is... I already have the teenager in my life. I feel like Tabby's aunt or Big Sister some days. It's nice to be around someone who has their whole life still in front of them, knowing that I might be able to make even a small contribution to her not wasting it.

For now, I will embrace the life I have. Me, the husband, the girls and the kitties.

Wednesday morning moments of happiness.

Today, since my alarm went off, has already been a good day. I am taking a moment to appreciate all the small things that went right.

Like my husband taking out the trash before I asked. Or my Hot Pocket not being freezer burned. How about putting on my makeup in record time? I even decided to spruce up my work outfit a bit today. I am carrying a purse. Maybe this is a start to a glorious work week.

Today was supposed to be my last day working the Philosophy counter. Just in case it is, I am going to do a major overhaul cleaning so it's ready for whomever comes in to take my place. Maybe my paperwork from Estee Lauder will be in and I'll do the switch this week.

Yay for more money!

Truly pathetic. A comedy.

The saddest thing you will ever learn about me is that I wish I could look more like my character on Rock Band 2. Insert laughter here.

Seriously, though. It's not just a weight thing, it's a complete lack of concern for any sort of societal guidelines to fashion or propiety. I can have a green fauxhawk while sporting a top that looks like a couple of demon's hands grabbing my tits. All right... so I actually hate that top and there isn't a fauxhawk in the options so far, but you get the drift.

I want to be able to dye my hair fun colors and be expressive with my clothing. Working in retail really puts barriers around all the crazy things you can try with different styles. So I will continue to use my face as a blank canvas and learn all I can about makeup.

In the meantime, I will be happy to let Lovely Rita wear all the insane outfits I don't have the option to.

It's too quiet.

The wind is lightly blowing outside, making the day comfortably cool and our front door is open to let some of the fresh air in.

There is a mixed emotion in moments like these. It's nice to have the time to enjoy doing nothing, even if only for five minutes. Relaxation, as an adult, is hard to come by without some sort of artificial help. Since I've always been a square, I have to drink in these moments and appreciate them when I can.

However...

I am a city girl. I love noise. I miss everything about the city that we lack here. The traffic, the shopping, the hole-in-the-wall markets or shops, the CHOICE of where you would like to get coffee on a lazy Sunday and the people. There aren't very many people around here that I can relate to. Because of that, I have one local friend. One. Mary was an Army brat in her early life, but was raised here after that and is most definitely a local. But Tosha, Stacey and Alicia are not. Even Tabby (my surrogate daughter, if you will) is an Army brat. And all my military friends are going to be gone in less than a year.

Let me see if I can help my West Coast friends understand the people in Missouri. Or, at least, small towns in Missouri. Springfield and St. Louis definitely have their share of diversity. But people here in the Waynesville/St. Robert area are generally... emotionless. They don't get overly excited or upset about anything. It's like there are small amounts of thorazine in the water supply. And they seem to be foreign to the ways of sarcasm. Okay, there is a big thing for me. Sarcasm is basically my first language. So I am really awkward when trying to joke around these people.

Not to mention that this place is in the Northern tip of the Bible Belt. I have no issues with people celebrating their religion, but there are a lot of restrictions on how everyone else enjoys their entertainment. Don't get me wrong... there is a really skeezy strip club on the outskirts of St. Robert, but that's not really my thing. They control what movies play here. Sadly, that has meant lately than anything supposedly intelligent or independent has been cast aside for things like Jackass 3-D.

Jackass, ladies and gentlemen, is our nation's first step towards "Ow, My Balls". See Idiocracy if you were lost on that reference.

All this just adds up into a feeling of being caged. We go to the city as often as we can, but money is always a big issue in life, so it's not as often as either of us would like. Maybe one or both of us will get lucky in our chosen professions and have the available funding to move. I think Josh would really like Seattle.

And I really miss Seattle.

An alarm clock named Nyx.

I went to a birthday/Passion Party last night and had such a great time that I was straight into bed upon returning home. God, but I wanted sleep. After the Paranormal Activity 2 fiasco, my brain was ready to shut down for at least a couple days. Sadly, I couldn't take my Ambien because I had a 7a.m. wake-up time and it was near midnight. No eight hours possible.

Seven came and my cell phone obnoxiously attempted to rouse me out of bed. I laid there for about ten seconds before thinking "The HELL with this. I'm sleeping until eight and I can still make it on time". So I reset the alarm for eight and snuggled happily back into my pillows.

For about two minutes.

Nyx is only five months old and weighs just over four pounds, so she's easy to miss when she walks up the length of the bed. But when she gets very close to your face and lets out a resounding "MEOW", you have no choice but to wake up and give her attention.

I can't believe the amount of character this little cat has. So now I've been awake since just after seven and still dreading the day ahead. Don't get me wrong, I love my job. It's fun to be able to play in makeup and skincare so I can get the public excited about it enough to buy some for themselves. And Too Faced cosmetics just joined the beauty bar on Thursday, so it's even more exciting. New things to try! It's just that my body just doesn't want to keep up after two nights of poor sleep.

Oh, well. Here's to a new day and my Friday!

6 a.m. Gross.

A friend of mine who worked with me at Movie Gallery has a fourteen-year-old daughter that comes over to my house sometimes to escape life or whatever and hang out. Last night, we were supposed to wait up to see the midnight showing of Paranormal Activity 2.

She came over in the afternoon and we had dinner, watched Grumpy Old Men, chatted a bit and waited for the time to leave for the theater.

One of us was supposed to be getting in with a free pass and she had told me that the website said nothing about passes not being accepted. I double-checked the site before leaving and discovered that she was wrong. Passes generally aren't accepted for brand-new releases, so we shrugged and headed to the theater.

The sign outside says that Paranormal Activity 2 was playing at 9:50. We were a little confused and thought maybe the sign was wrong... but it was completely accurate and there was NO midnight showing of the movie. So there we were at the theater, decked out in our PJs cause I was usually in bed and deeply into an Ambien coma by then, being told by a group of teenagers that the movie was almost over. And wasn't very good, anyway.

I pretty much guessed the last part. I remember when the Blair Witch Project was a big deal and the second one was absolute crap that had NOTHING to do with the first, so I wasn't really all that upset.

Instead, we headed to the store to grab a couple needed groceries to make a birthday cake for a friend of mine and arrived home over an hour earlier than planned. I certainly don't mind, considering the early time I had to be up this morning.

Ugh. Six. I'm sure it wouldn't feel this way if I had eight hours of sleep last night, but those are the sacrifices you make sometimes. Yesterday simply wasn't my day, but I laughed all the little things away. Murphy was definitely getting some entertainment at my expense.

Here's to hoping today is a little better.